Why Centre-Backs in Soccer can be Called Upon to Save Society.

There are many personalities that exist out there who feel they can make a difference in our world.

It takes all kinds to make a society function, but very few can be looked upon as being able to solve society's problems.  Those who play Centre-Back (CB) on soccer teams are some of those select few.  You know who they are and you know what I'm talking about.  

This is about real centre backs, not wannabees who think they can do the job.  Sometimes a player who is struggling to fit into a line-up declares themselves a centre back.  Wrong.  It's not a position, it's a raison d'être, a passion, sometimes a sickness.  People can slip into the spot and tactically/technically carry out the duties, but that doesn't make them a centre back.   Sometimes they will morph into a true centre back, sometimes they won't.



I am not talking about high level, professional centre-backs, but the ones who toil in that glory free role on amateur teams.  They're clean cut.  They don't smile and they don't cry.  Their shoes are black and they avoid any flashy designs on them.  They do their jobs well.  (Professional centre backs are awesome too and some of my favourite players, but I am not writing about them today.)

As a rule, I admire defenders as I've written before, but there is still something different about the centre back.

It's a difficult position to sell to parents when the players are young.  For some hockey parents, they feel
defending roles are a demotion.  Seriously.  For those who grew up playing soccer in Canada or the USA, an uninformed coach during their youth might have put the players who were not as athletic back there and whoever couldn't do that was the goalkeeper. Think about the tactical stupidity in that. 

Let's examine this person and you will see what I mean by declaring them as our beacon of hope.  For the record, I was not a centre-back and neither were any of my sons.

• They are strong, fit and fast. They fear nobody or nothing.
• When the team scores and the striker is dancing by the corner flag, the CB is thinking ahead on what might come and how best to keep the team organized and focused during this time of euphoria.  They don't get caught up in the hoopla.
• If you step into a CB's penalty area, be ready to pay a hefty price if you threaten the goal. Have ice nearby and prepacked into small bags.
• When the opposing CB steps into your penalty area, you re-organize because you appreciate the disruptive presence that is upon you.
• When opposing teams try to get something going, the CB breaks it up.
• When your team needs to get something started, it usually starts from the CB.  And they like it that way.
• They have a look on their face.  You know the look.  And when your coach puts you back there, you adopt the look.
• People think the goalkeeper is in charge.  Being a team player, CBs let people think that.
• They don't give lip.  They let your pain do the talking for them.
• They know when to slide and when to stay on their feet.  They know when to administer a crunching challenge and when to be patient.  They just know.  Down to the millimetre, more accurate than a GPS, they know exactly where they are in relation to the penalty area and never crunch an opponent
  in dangerous places.
• Regardless if you are a teammate or opponent, you will be the first to know if the CB sees you as a threat to their team.
• The CB gives you one chance to be in place while defending set pieces.  If you feel somebody grabbing your arm and dragging you towards an opposing player who needs to be marked, it's your CB.
• They walk differently.  Not boastful or shy.  Just different.
• You worry about how many goals you score.  They celebrate in how many they deny.  They count how many strikers learn to play one-touch soccer when the CB is nearby. 
• They stake their claim early in a match and willing to give up an early free kick from distance.  They ensure the striker is hesitant to come back.
• If you want to make something happen on a corner kick,  do it now, because the CB ain't gonna let it happen twice.
• The CB knows every soft spot on your foot.
• Their job is a science to them. 
• They are selfless and focused for 90 minutes. 
• By grabbing your untucked jersey or the waistband of your shorts, they will HELP you stay tight in the free kick wall.
• They are rarely the team's Man-of-the-Match, and they're OK with that. 
• Centre backs kindly decline invitations to play other positions.
• They play CB at the family picnic, during pickup games, on the company team and assume the back two handles on the foosball table.
• Centre backs are NEVER hurt.

When I begin a tryout, I try to identify who might be the CB and work out from there.  They usually make themselves known early.  Maybe my Italian heritage dictates that I covet defenders, who knows.  People who know me know that when I assign you to play CB, I am paying you an unbelievable compliment.

Think about the personalities and problems that plague our news today.  We have serious problems that require serious people offering serious solutions.  The people who offer the qualities we need are toiling in the defensive third of pitches and hammering strikers from Stockholm to Terra del Fuego . What they offer in character would appeal to any working group looking to improve their situation.

Need to distribute food to the hungry?  Get a centre back on the job.

I somebody threatening to disrupt the flow of food to the hungry? You know who can fix that.

Need to enforce a cease-fire somewhere?  Call a CB.

Expecting a natural disaster and need a calm leader durng the aftermath?  Appoint a CB.

House haunted? Call a CB.  They ain't afraid of no ghost.

Falling behind on a project?  A CB will rally the group get it back on track.  The Death Star reconstruction would have never fallen behind schedule if a CB was in charge.

Need a bouncer at your college pub? CBs can do the job

Bodygaurd? CB

Spokesman? CB

Regardless of gender and level, CBs may be the answer to many of society's woes.